{"id":18,"date":"2010-12-24T17:39:53","date_gmt":"2010-12-24T17:39:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.revolutionsf.com\/revblogs\/zombielapdance\/2010\/12\/24\/food-frakking-for-christmas\/"},"modified":"2012-08-17T05:23:50","modified_gmt":"2012-08-17T05:23:50","slug":"food-frakking-for-christmas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.revolutionsf.com\/revblogs\/zombielapdance\/2010\/12\/24\/food-frakking-for-christmas\/","title":{"rendered":"Food Frakking for Christmas"},"content":{"rendered":"

This week I cooked some of the compulsory ethnic food of my people. This years batch of lefse was the best I ever made. It formed into a clean ball of dough.
\n
\nIt cooked on the pan without getting stiff.
\n
\nAnd the final product had a supple and flexible texture.
\n
\nAnd I couldn’t tell you why this batch was better, because I did several things different. I think it was either the cast iron frying pan (which I had bought for making tortillas) or the shortening that I substituted for the cream. Using trans fats always gives baked goods that professional touch.<\/p>\n

When one has a lot of lefse on hand, it’s hard not to create the cultural bastardization of a Norwegian breakfast taco.
\n<\/p>\n

The krumkaka iron made its yearly foray out of the closet.
\n
\nI forced my food-frakking deputy Julia to run to the Walmart and buy some whipped cream.
\n
\nA Christmas without whipped cream-filled krumkaka would be unthinkable.<\/p>\n

The spritz cookie press also made an appearance.
\n
\nI colored the dough with both yellow and blue food colorings before I noticed that the set actually had a green color. I hope that wasn’t the tipping point of artificial additives that cause cancer. But I guess it’s worth the risk.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This week I cooked some of the compulsory ethnic food of my people. This years batch of lefse was the best I ever made. It formed into a clean ball of dough. It cooked on the pan without getting stiff. … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nFood Frakking for Christmas - Zombie Lapdance<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.revolutionsf.com\/revblogs\/zombielapdance\/2010\/12\/24\/food-frakking-for-christmas\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Food Frakking for Christmas - Zombie Lapdance\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This week I cooked some of the compulsory ethnic food of my people. 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