THIS WEEK STARTS DHARMA BUM OFF AT HIS NEW JOB AND COLLEGE! HE ASKED ME TO BLOG FOR HIM BECAUSE HE’S TOO BUSY! I AM HERE TO MAKE YOU LAUGH! I AM HERE TO MAKE YOU DANCE! HERE’S A LITTLE FRIEND TO HELP ENCOURAGE YOU!!!!!

THAT BRINGS US TO THE TOPIC OF THE DAY! THE BEST THING ABOUT THE INTERNET IS ALL THE WOMEN HERE! SOME LADIES EVEN RESPONDED TO MY AD ON CRAIGSLIST!

"Dear Strong Mad,

I love men who can tell me what’s what. Ever since I saw your picture, I’ve dreamed about waxing your cube like mass with some turtle grease. How would you like to return the favor?

Single in Singapore"

DID YOU JUST SAY TURTLE GREASE?

"clientsnameis;Strong Mad,

How are you doing with the burlington coat factory after Christmas event? Take off your glasses and start slip sliding across the floor in your new jeans, that’s how! Please enter your identity theft numbers in a poptart box, and throw it out the window. A special collections agency agent will specially collect your collection special agent’s collection agency special collections agency agent special collections!

Special!
Helga Vrumbgoldsts"

I’M NOT FALLING FOR THAT ONE AGAIN! I GIVE MY HEART AWAY TOO EASILY!

"MR. STRONGMAD,

WHAT IS UP WITH YOU? YOU ARE SO CUTE! I THINK YOU ARE SO CUTE!

GIRL STRONGMAD,
GIRL STRONG MAD"

DELETED! MAYBE E-DATING ISN’T FOR ME! THAT IS OKAY, AS LONG AS I HAVE MY HOT ALBUMS!

THIS ISN’T HELPING ME WITH MY PORTUGESE!