[  Mood: Cool ]
NES/Famicon – Heterosexual male. Suffered greatly from the frat boy mentality that the only way to express committment was through pain. Almost every game for it is impossibly hard, a great way for those who aren’t looking to get into any long relationships to get out of them quickly. Gave V.D. to Peach, Zelda and Samus Aran.

SNES – Bisexual transgender shemale. There was something for everyone on this console. Games were so fun, that you felt dirty after playing them. Gina Gershon in 32 bit form.

Nintendo 64 – Asexual male. The first console to have a phallic controller.

Between James Bond, Mario Kart and Bomberman 64, it had no need for the touch of a woman.

Gamecube – Virgin female. Total chick console.

Wii – Most fun girlfriend ever. She likes go karts, paintball, bowling and cartoons. You don’t want the relationship to go forward nor end, you just want these lovey dovey days to last forever, and so does she.