Dharma Bum

[ Mood: Evil ]
[ Currently: Watching the internet. ]
1. Lock them in a room with Christmas in the Stars playing in the background.
2. Yell, "WHAT DID YOU DO WITH WALT’S HEAD, MURDERER!?" at a guy in a Mickey costume at Disney World in front of a bunch of kids.
3. Sneak up on a duck and punt it into a crowd.
4. Raise your leg, grab your ankle and do the Roger Rabbit while farting in an elevator.
5. Take a bite out of every piece of food at a cafeteria lunch line, and then put it all back. Then vomit on the register, and announce, "My what a lovely tea party."
6. Constantly talk about how much better the Star Wars prequels would be if it had been more like your eight years old fan fiction.
7. Be fat and brag about your black belt.
8. Approach a podium at a Science Fiction convention and refuse to step down until someone asks a question about your book.
9. Sit between rows of pews and meditate on the Buddha while chanting in the middle of mass.
10. Naked public yoga.

Do I regret moving from California? Honestly, a little.