To the shock and amazement of nearly nobody, I’m a programming participant at Armadillocon 33. This will be my 19th Armadillocon as a programming guest. (Every one since 1991 save the 1997 “relaxacon” following the ’97 Worldcon in San Antonio.)

This year’s headliners are

Guest of Honor: Paolo Bacigalupi
Special Guests: Emma Bull and Will Shetterly
Editor Guest: Lou Anders
Artist Guest: Vincent Villafranca
Fan Guest: Fred Duarte, Jr.
Toastmaster: Mark Finn

My schedule for the con:

Friday 9 PM

Apes in SF: The Battle for the Return
Chris Brown, Scott Cupp, Mark Finn*, Rick Klaw, Jess Nevins, Lee Thomas

A discussion of classic simian stories. Mangani bundolo!
(My first ape panel in nearly 5 years.)

Saturday 11 AM

Editor Guest Interview
Lou Anders, Mark Finn*, Rick Klaw*
(Pity poor Lou. Would you want to be subjected to an interview conducted by me and Finn?)

Saturday Noon

Comics and the Move Online
Gordon Andrews, Michael Ashleigh Finn, Brad Foster, Rick Klaw*, David Liss, Bill Williams

With the success of web comics and the growing frequency of reading comics-for-print on tablets and smartphones, a whole new world is opening up for creators and readers. How does this affect the creative process, and what does it mean for collectors?

Saturday 8PM

Cyberpunk: How it Influenced Fiction, Technology, and the World
Lou Antonelli, Chris Brown*, Michael Ashleigh Finn, Rick Klaw

Cyberpunk was a hugely visible literary movement that started in the 80s. It caused readers to think about the role of technology in their lives in entirely different ways. What were the results?

Sunday 10 AM

Book Covers: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Lou Anders, Paolo Bacigalupi, Brad Foster, Rocky Kelley*, Rick Klaw, Martha Wells

How does a cover artist balance creative impulses with the imperative to create a cover that sells books? What are the notable successes and failures?

Sunday 2PM

Signing

Lou Antonelli, Rick Klaw, Josh Rountree

If you’re at the con, stop by and say howdy.

My Armadillocon schedule was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

[  Mood: Angry ]
[ Currently: Getting read to go shopping ]
So on Google+ Marvin Ryan Vista posted a thought

And someone followed up with

Now I am a teacher and part of what I teach is Math, and the above thinking gets my blood boiling. So I wrote a follow-up and I liked it so much, I wanted to preserve it. So here it is below:

I put together “6 ’80s horror films more in need of a remake than Fright Night.”

Over at Blastr, I explain the whys, etc for each film selected along with my choice of dream director for each remake.

For the Geek Curmudgeon faithful, I researched the streaming availability of the films mentioned. I referenced Netflix, Amazon Prime, Crackle, Hulu, and Hulu Plus.

Fright Night (1985)

Currently not available.

Dead & Buried (1981)

Netflix

Lifeforce (1985)

Netflix

Silver Bullet (1985)

Currently not available.

Prince of Darkness (1987)

Netflix

Amazon Prime

Monkey Shines (1988)

Netflix

Hulu

The ‘Burbs (1989)

Currently not available.

So after reading my Blastr piece, you can now check out some of the movies I discussed and see just how far off base I am.

*Word of caution. This info is accurate as of August 19, 2011. The availability of streaming titles is nearly always in flux. YMMV.*

Six ’80s horror films in need of a remake BONUS COVERAGE was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

Let’s take a quick look to see what’s arrived at the Geek Compound.

The Urban Fantasy Anthology
Edited by Peter S. Beagle & Joe R. Lansdale
Cover by Elizabeth Story

Promo copy:

Urban fantasy, one of the fastest-growing categories of fiction, is finally fully defined and showcased in this comprehensive star-studded collection. Previously difficult for readers to discover in its new modes, urban fantasy is represented here in all three of its distinct styles, including the playful new mythologies of Charles de Lint, the sexy paranormal romances of Patricia Briggs, and the gritty urban-noir of Neil Gaiman. Whether they feature tattooed demon-hunters, angst-y vampires, supernatural gumshoes, or pixelated pixies, these authors mash-up traditional fare with pop culture, creating iconic characters, conflicted moralities, and complex settings. The result is starkly original fiction that has broad-based appeal and is immensely entertaining.

Table of Contents

Introduction by Peter S. Beagle

Mythic Fiction
Introduction: “A Personal Journey into Mythic Fiction” by Charles de Lint
Emma Bull, “A Bird That Whistles”
Charles de Lint, “Make a Joyful Noise”
Neil Gaiman, “The Goldfish Pool and Other Stories”
Jeffrey Ford, “On the Road to New Egypt”
Peter S. Beagle, “Julie’s Unicorn”

Paranormal Romance
Introduction: “A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Urban Fantasy” by Paula Guran
Charles de Lint, “Companions to the Moon”
Kelley Armstrong, “A Haunted House of Her Own”
Norman Partridge, “She’s My Witch”
Carrie Vaughn, “Kitty’s Zombie New Year”
Patricia Briggs, “Seeing Eye”
Bruce McAllister, “Hit”
Suzy McKee Charnas, “Boobs”
Francesca Lia Block, “Farewell, My Zombie”

Noir Fantasy
Introduction: “We Are Not a Club, but We Sometimes Share a Room” by Joe R. Lansdale
Thomas M. Disch, “The White Man”
Susan Palwick, “Gestella”
Holly Black, “The Coldest Girl in Coldtown”
Steven R. Boyett, “Talking Back to the Moon”
Joe R. Lansdale, “On the Far Side of the Cadillac Desert with Dead Folks”
Tim Powers, “The Bible Repairman”
Al Sarrantonio, “Father Dear”

WOW! An amazing collection of tales.

Hellbent (Cheshire Red Reports, Book 2)
by Cherie Priest

Promo copy:

BAD TO THE BONE

Vampire thief Raylene Pendle doesn’t need more complications in her life. Her Seattle home is already overrun by a band of misfits, including Ian Stott, a blind vampire, and Adrian deJesus, an ex-Navy SEAL/drag queen. But Raylene still can’t resist an old pal’s request: seek out and steal a bizarre set of artifacts. Also on the hunt is a brilliant but certifiably crazy sorceress determined to stomp anyone who gets in her way. But Raylene’s biggest problem is that the death of Ian’s vaunted patriarch appears to have made him the next target of some blood-sucking sociopaths. Now Raylene must snatch up the potent relics, solve a murder, and keep Ian safe—all while fending off a psychotic sorceress. But at least she won’t be alone. A girl could do a lot worse for a partner than an ass-kicking drag queen—right?

Star Wars: Heir to the Empire: The 20th Anniversary Edition
by Timothy Zahn

Promo copy:

Here is a special 20th anniversary edition of the #1 New York Times bestselling novel that reignited the entire Star Wars publishing phenomenon—featuring an Introduction and annotations from award-winning author Timothy Zahn, exclusive commentary from Lucasfilm and Del Rey Books, and a brand-new novella starring the ever-popular Grand Admiral Thrawn. The biggest event in the history of Star Wars books, Heir to the Empire follows the adventures of Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, and Princess Leia after they led the Rebel Alliance to victory in Star Wars: Episode VI Return of the Jedi.

Five years after the Death Star was destroyed and Darth Vader and the Emperor were defeated, the galaxy is struggling to heal the wounds of war, Princess Leia and Han Solo are married and expecting twins, and Luke Skywalker has become the first in a long-awaited line of new Jedi Knights.

But thousands of light-years away, the last of the Emperor’s warlords—the brilliant and deadly Grand Admiral Thrawn—has taken command of the shattered Imperial fleet, readied it for war, and pointed it at the fragile heart of the New Republic. For this dark warrior has made two vital discoveries that could destroy everything the courageous men and women of the Rebel Alliance fought so hard to create.

The explosive confrontation that results is a towering epic of action, invention, mystery, and spectacle on a galactic scale—in short, a story worthy of the name Star Wars.

Circle of Enemies
by Harry Connolly
Cover by Christian McGrath

Promo copy:

Former car thief Ray Lilly is now the expendable grunt of a sorcerer responsible for destroying extradimensional predators summoned to our world by power-hungry magicians. Luckily, Ray has some magic of his own, and so far it’s kept him alive. But when a friend from his former gang calls him back to his old stomping grounds in Los Angeles, Ray may have to face a threat even he can’t handle. A mysterious spell is killing Ray’s former associates, and they blame him. Worse yet, the spell was cast by Wally King, the sorcerer who first dragged Ray into the brutal world of the Twenty Palace Society. Now Ray will have to choose between the ties of the past and the responsibilities of the present, as he and the Society face not only Wally King but a bizarre new predator.

Yiddishkeit: Jewish Vernacular and the New Land
Edited by Harvey Pekar & Paul Buhle
Introduction by Neal Gabler
Cover by David Lasky

Promo copy:

Yiddish is everywhere. We hear words like nosh, schlep, and schmutz all the time, but how did these words come to pepper American English? In Yiddishkeit: Jewish Vernacular and the New Land, Harvey Pekar and Paul Buhle trace the influence of Yiddish from medieval Europe to the tenements of New York’s Lower East Side. This comics anthology contains original stories by notable writers and artists such as Barry Deutsch, Peter Kuper, Spain Rodriguez, and Sharon Rudahl. Through illustrations, comics art, and a full-length play, four major themes are explored: culture, performance, assimilation, and the revival of the language. The last fully realized work by Harvey Pekar, this book is a thoughtful compilation that reveals the far-reaching influences of Yiddish.

What an unexpected pleasure. I was unaware of this fascinating book until it showed up at the Geek Compound. Can’t wait to dive into this beautiful tome.

Books received 8/19/11 was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

Just in time for the new Conan film, I explored seven lesser-known Robert E. Howard characters who could make for a far more interesting movie than Conan for Blastr.

I cover characters ranging from Bran Mak Morn to Dark Agnes de Chastillon. “Who?” you ask. Read the article to find out about them and five other fascinating creations.

7 Howard characters who could make a better movie than Conan was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

Let’s take a quick look to see what’s arrived at the Geek Compound.

The Mandel Files, Volume 1: Mindstar Rising & A Quantum Murder
by Peter F. Hamilton

Promo copy:

For the first time in a single volume, Peter F. Hamilton’s acclaimed novels—Mindstar Rising and A Quantum Murder—set in a near-future so real it seems ripped from tomorrow’s headlines

In Mindstar Rising, Greg Mandel, gifted—or cursed—with biotechnology that makes him a living lie detector, is hired to investigate corporate espionage by Event Horizon, a powerful company about to introduce a technology that will solve the energy problems of a world decimated by global warming.

Set two years later, A Quantum Murder once again teams Mandel with Event Horizon and its beautiful young owner, Julia Evans, in a locked-room mystery that combines the ingenuity of an Agatha Christie novel with cutting-edge speculative brilliance.

Read together, these novels take on fresh depth and complexity, underscoring the magnitude of Peter F. Hamilton’s creative talent.

Rage
by Matthew Costello
Cover by Stephan Martiniere

Promo copy:

An action-packed adventure based on the award-winning videogame from id Software, the creators of DOOM® and QUAKE®, Rage follows one man’s fight to save the future of humanity in a ravaged, post-apocalyptic world.

The asteroid Apophis has annihilated Earth, and only a small percentage of humanity’s best and brightest have been saved. Buried deep below the ground in life-sustaining Arks, these chosen few are tasked with one vital mission—to restore civilization to a devastated planet hundreds of years after the impact.

When Lieutenant Nick Raine emerges from his Ark, he finds a future indistinguishable from nightmare. Humankind has not been entirely destroyed on the surface world, and a primitive new society has emerged in which life is nasty, brutish, and short. Mutants and bandits prey upon the weak, and a mysterious military group known as the Authority preys upon everyone. Worst of all, a would-be tyrant seeks to impose his will upon the shattered planet. Armed with nothing more than his combat training and survival instincts, Raine must rise to meet the challenges of the wasteland.

Wayfinder
by C. E. Murphy
Cover by Gene Mollica

Promo copy:

THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE—IF IT DOESN’T KILL YOU FIRST

Lara Jansen is a truthseeker, gifted—or cursed—with the magical ability to tell honesty from lies. Once she was a tailor in Boston, but now she has crossed from Earth to the Barrow-lands, a Faerie world embroiled in a bloody civil war between Seelie and Unseelie. Armed with an enchanted and malevolent staff which seeks to bend her to its dark will, and thrust into a deadly realm where it’s hard to distinguish friend from foe, Lara is sure of one thing: her love for Dafydd ap Caerwyn, the Faerie prince who sought her help in solving a royal murder and dousing the flames of war before they consumed the Barrow-lands.

But now Dafydd is missing, perhaps dead, and the Barrow-lands are closer than ever to a final conflagration. Lara has no other choice: she must harness the potent but perilous magic of the staff and her own truthseeking talents, blazing a path to a long-forgotten truth—a truth with the power to save the Barrow-lands or destroy them.

The Measure of the Magic: Legends of Shannara
by Terry Brooks
Cover by Steve Stone

Promo copy:

After more than three decades of captivating epic fantasy readers, the storytelling magic of New York Times bestselling author Terry Brooks’s Shannara saga continues to enthrall. Now the fascinating chronicle of Shannara’s prehistory reaches a thrilling new peak in the sequel to Bearers of the Black Staff.

For five hundred years, the survivors of the Great Wars lived peacefully in a valley sanctuary shielded by powerful magic from the blighted and dangerous outside world. But the enchanted barriers have crumbled, the borders have been breached by predators, and the threat of annihilation looms large once more. Sider Ament, bearer of the last black staff and its profound power, devoted his life to protecting the valley and its inhabitants—and, in his final moments, gave stewardship of the black staff to the young tracker Panterra Qu. Now the newly anointed Knight of the Word must take up the battle against evil wherever it threatens: from without, where an army of bloodthirsty trolls is massing for invasion; and from within, where the Elf king of Arborlon has been murdered, his daughter, Princess Phryne Amarantyne, stands accused, and a heinous conspiracy is poised to subjugate the kingdom. But even these will pale beside the most harrowing menace Panterra is destined to confront—a nameless, merciless figure who wanders the devastated land on a relentless mission: to claim the last black staff … and the life of he who wields it.

Books received 8/17/11 Del Rey edition was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

Let’s take a quick look to see what’s arrived at the Geek Compound.

Marvel Knights: Thor & Loki Blood Brothers

Promo copy:

The great halls of Asgard have fallen silent since a new king has overtaken the throne. His name is Loki, son of almighty Odin, brother to the Thunder God, Thor. Once a powerful trickster, the God of Mischief, Loki now rules a grand kingdom with little regard for its subjects. His only thoughts are focused inward, toward the origins of his own pain and suffering. To quell his torment and to gain the respect he feels he so rightfully deserves, Loki must now execute the prisoner chained deep within the dungeons of Asgard, the one man who has ever shown him love. His own brother.

Adapted from the acclaimed miniseries Loki, from Robert Rodi and Esad Ribic, Thor & Loki: Blood Brothers takes a powerful look inside the minds of two legendary nemeses, shedding light, like never before, on the depths of Thor and Loki’s hatred, and love, for one another.

Marksmen #1
Created by Michael Benaroya
Story by David Baxter & Dave Elliott
Art by Javier Aranda & Garry Leach
Cover by Tomm Coker

Promo copy:

Sixty years ago the oil ran out and debts were called in. Civil war followed that splintered America into warring fiefdoms. New San Diego is a technocratic utopia that offers the last bastion of peace and prosperity, provided you live within its walls. Drake McCoy is its best protector. McCoy, an expert marksman, defends the city from the numerous threats in the wasteland outside the walls. But when the oil rich Lone Star state sends a powerful army to steal New San Diego’s energy technology, even Drake’s leadership and skill may not be enough to fend off the siege.

The Angry Beavers: Seasons One & Two

Promo copy:

When twin beavers Norbert and Daggett leave their home behind to begin living the lifestyle of wild and crazy bachelors, hilarity is bound to ensue. Featuring all 26 episodes from the zany show’s first two seasons, this sidesplitting four-disc set of Nickelodeon’s hit The Angry Beavers is guaranteed to have you rolling with laughter! Includes fan-favorite episodes such as “Bummer Of Love,” “Fancy Prance,” “Food Of The Clods,” “If You Insisters,” “Beaver Fever,” “The Day The Earth Got Really Screwed Up” and more!

Stuff received 8/16/11 was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

For my latest installment of Nexus Graphica, I discuss one of my favorite topics.

Alongside the apes, I also review The Homeland Directive, Orbital 3. Nomads, Orbital 4. Ravages, and The Jack Kirby Omnibus Volume One Featuring Green Arrow.

The Funny Book Ape was originally published on The Geek Curmudgeon

[  Mood: Cool ]
[  Currently: Listening to CBC Radio ]
Let me just start by saying, I love Barry Lyga. His books Adventures of Fan Boy and Goth Girl, Boy Toy and Goth Girl Rising are intense, well written stories about modern teens facing modern issues. But his books tend to be aimed at the older teens, meaning that they are not right for my Grade 8 students. So when I saw he had written a book for late junior and intermediate I had to read it.

Thanks to his pranks, Kyle is the most popular kid in town. He has managed to prank everyone, his teachers, his peers and the police. He was setting up one of those pranks when the plasma storm hit. He was knocked unconscious and woke up three days later smarter, invulnerable to pain and able to fly.

And he’s not the only one. A teenager was found after the storm, suffering from amnesia and possessing powers similar to Kyle’s. Mike, as the boy comes to be known, quickly becomes the most popular kid in town, displacing Kyle. This makes Kyle very jealous, and he begins to plan a pranks to expose Mike as the fake he thinks he is.

Unfortunately, these pranks quickly get out of hand, and Kyle is painted as a villain who is out to hurt all. Can Kyle convince the town that Mike isn’t the goody two-shoes he seems? Can he avoid capture by the authorities as he learns to master his own powers.

This book was a difficult read, because it was quite obvious to me that Kyle is a self-centred, jerk who can’t handle his demotion to second banana in the kids eyes. And it was hard to have any sympathy for him, and when you can’t empathize with the main character, it makes reading a book a tough slog. Too bad, because author Barry Lyga has proved before that he is a very competent author who is not afraid to deal with tough topics head on, treating his readers with a respect and maturity that many others lack.

[  Mood: Fed Up WIth Life ]
[ Currently: Thinking abouta nap ]
Dear Art-Is-In Bakery

When I discovered your products at the Ottawa Farmer’s market a few years ago, I immediately fell in love. To the point that I bought only your baked goods. I had no problem lining-up for your bread and would happily tell people asking why I would wait that long, why your bread was worth it. And when your retail store opened, I found excuses to drive from the Walkley/Conroy area to buy bread and sandwiches at the drop of the hat. I even added your bread to a scavenger hunt/car rally I ran this year.

Unfortunatley, I have to tell you, my love affair has come to an end. In the last four weeks you have been sold out three times of what I am looking for by the time I get to the Ottawa Farmer’s Market. The first two times were at 10:30 and today was 9:00 am. One hour after the market opened. Apparently you didn’t bring as much because of the supposed rain, the other time an oven was broken, and there was no reason given the third time.

So I as I had to explain to my crying three year-old why he wouldn’t be having his Sunday treat of one of your cinamon buns for the third time in four weeks, despite his getting up early and moving as fast as possible to get to the market to get said treat, it occured to me, it’s over.

That’s right. I no longer need your products. Because you no longer need me. When you were a smaller outfit, my business mattered. But now that you are "trendy", are selling par baked frozen bread to hotels across Canada and offer "bespoke" breads to those rich enough to matter, I am not who you want to sell too. This would explain your lack of effort in trying to keep my business.

And I am happy for you. It’s nice that you are doing so well in a recession to turn business away. You are an Ottawa success story and should be feted as such. I just hope your new friends will be as loyal as your old ones were once you are no longer the "new thing" everyone has to have.

And don’t worry about me and my family. We will find a new bakery to give me what I need. And no, I have no interest in buying your bread at one of the many places you seem to have set up as resellers. I told you, it’s over and that means I won’t be sneaking a slice or two under the table.

Best of luck in the future.