Items of geekity interest should be only two minutes long. Trailers make us laugh. They make us cry. They work so hard to make us happy.

Trailer Probe rates the geek explosion content, how much our cortex is combusted with a volley of geekitude. Dork disengagement level is reasons you won't dig it.

2012

Roland Emmerich does another mega-disaster flick, like Independence Day and Day After Tomorrow, where Jake Gyllenhaal outran the weather. This trailer has exactly one special effects shot. Now if the rest of the movie has some Himalayas getting flooded, I'm good. Up yours, Himalayas!

I like how the trailer says go to Google and search for the movie title. That says "We don't have time to make a freaking bare-bones website. Shut up."

Here's what the monks are saying.

Monk #1: I'm going to bang the gong with the big log.

Monk #2: What?

Monk #1: Dude, the big log! Let's bang it!

Monk #1 and #2: OOOOOH CRAAAAAAAAAAP!

Dork disengagement level: This is not about Rush! They rule! If you name a movie 2112, then the Rush Army expects a movie about Rush! Hang on. The movie's name is 2012. Never mind.

Geek explosion level: 300,000 geek parts per million. This trailer needs more Cusack, especially since he's in the movie. I bet he makes a phone call in the rain.

But then, he does that in movies where there is no apocalypse.