What, you might be asking, am I doing reviewing a dream-analysis show on a site about sci-fi-ish things? Well, you might ask the Sci Fi Channel. They're the ones who aired it on their channel, so it merits a word from us.

This show was a recent addition to the Sci Fi Channel lineup. Two episodes of it ran back to back on weeknights. In February, I discovered it had moved to first thing in the morning, from 7 to 8 Central. It's not on Sci Fi's schedule for March, and there's not an official section for it on SciFi.com anymore.

Don't dream, it's over! Hey now! Hey now! Sorry: Crowded House moment.

I questioned its existence in the first place. It's obviously a somewhat inexpensive, reach-out-to-the-mundanes kind of show, designed to draw in that all-important casual viewer, and also seemed designed not to cost the Sci Fi Channel much money.

(To which I issue this rebuttal: Comedy Central doesn't show documentaries to get the non-comedy fans to tune in.)

It worked for them with "Crossing Over With John Edward," though. The shows are two different animals. John Edward purports to be contacting the spirits of the departed. This, if one presumes that he actually has such a power and isn't a big faker, is a supernatural ability. That falls solidly in the realm of horror, which is under the bigger umbrella of speculative fiction. So I could understand a show like that airing on Sci Fi, I suppose.

But on "Dream Team," all they do is talk about dreams. Everybody has those. That's not speculative or fictional.

(By the way, what's up with Edward's rival / bandwagon-jumper James Von Praagh, from "Beyond With James Van Praagh"? That name "Praagh" is Klingon for something, I'm sure of it.)

Another difference is the weepy, gooey content of "Crossing Over." When a spirit from the beyond was contacted, most of the time it resulted in teary catharsis for the loved one of the departed.

On the almost one full episode of "Team" that I have seen, I saw no emotional moment where the meaning of one's dream led someone to be able to move on with anything meaningful, like waking the hell up and going to work.

As a talk show team, Annabelle Gurwitch and Michael Lennox are no Letterman and Shaffer. They're not even a Jerry Springer and Bald Guy Who Puts People in Chokeholds. Michael is the dream expert, Annabelle is the everywoman who the audience can relate to and says funny things. As an old-school pro wrestling fan, I resent them stealing the name "Dream Team" from Greg "The Hammer" Valentine and Brutus Beefcake.

Annabelle was funny and cool when she was on TBS' "Dinner and a Movie." In between movies, she and her partner on the show would make food. Her IMDB entry says she was a writer for "Thundercats." Too bad she can't whip up some lasagna while Michael is blithering. She could use another show. Hopefully one with 100 percent less dream stuff.

Dreams often don't make a lick of sense. Imagine a half-hour of people babbling about being naked, then being half-plant, then flying on a rainbow. I mean without the benefit of the wacky tobaccy. You don't have to imagine -- this is what this whole show is about.

Annabelle looks way too emotionally invested when the audience members tell the "Team" about their dreams. Of course, this is her job, so why not? She also has an intense squint that seems to say "Get out of my studio, you freak" and an incredulous expression that says "Damn, you're crazy." But her presence doesn't make the show any better, just slightly less idiotic.

Michael, on the other hand, is the "expert," so he can really dissect the psychology and subtext, what your subconscious is really trying to tell you. Michael always launches into a rambling spew of common sense horse-hockey. Any layman or laywoman or stranger on the street could tell you that if you dream about flying, you wish you were more free. But this show reserves such pronouncements for their expert. You dream about being naked? You have a fear of being exposed. Duh! Thank you and come again.

Unlike the emotional reactions on "Crossing Over," the reactions when people hear their dream analysis are -- unintentionally, I'm sure -- funny. On one, an audience member dreamed she got chopped into pieces, then met a frog. Michael said that chopping results in death, which leads to rebirth. And the frog, in fairy tales, is always a prince who's just waiting to be kissed! So her rebirth will come through meeting the right guy for her!

Then Annabelle asked her what she thought about what Michael explained. The girl stared incredulously at them for a moment, then said "Um... I guess that sounds right." YEAH! Dream Team 1, silly-ass dreams GOOSE-EGG, baby!

I hesitate to use the word "suck" in a review. So many reviewers bandy it about such that it's lost all its weight, all import. It'd be a waste to use the word on this show.

So I won't use that word to describe "The Dream Team with Annabelle and Michael." But I had a dream that I did. What does THAT mean?